How Do You Plant The Seeds That Produce Positive, Empowering Beliefs and Actions?
We are always explaining things to ourselves, and making comments to ourselves, agree? The question is, what are we saying and what are we hearing?
What we say to ourselves radically affects the quality of our lives, and our ability to do things effectively.
Are you aware when you participate in negative inner dialog/selftalk, irrational ideas and beliefs?
Is positive self talk the solution to all negative emotions? How can you defeat negative self talk when positive self talk simply doesn’t work?
Below are some of the things that positive and negative people say. Look at the difference, and start talking to yourself in more constructive ways, if you don’t already.
Positive People explain bad things by externalizing these events eg –
“The weather caused it.”.
They consider these circumstances temporary eg –
“That was a rough couple hours.”.
They see them as isolated instances eg –
“THAT part of the plan didn’t work, but…”.
When they explain good things, they internalize these feelings eg -“Life is great!”
They also consider these events or circumstances to be more or less permanent changes eg –
“Now I know how to do this.” They also tend to generalize from a situation, below are a few more examples
“Things are working out well.”
“I’ve done well with this.”
“This has become a great business to be in.”
“I like the way things are going.”
“That just went bad due to the weather.”
“It was rough for an hour or two.”
“The car broke down, but the trip was fun.”
Negative People explain bad things by internalizing them eg – “It’s me again.”
They consider these events permanent eg – “It’s always this way.”
They will tend to generalize eg – “Life is so bad.”
When they explain good things, they externalize them eg –
“That’s just lucky.”
Negative people consider these events to only be a once off or temporary situation eg –
“That went well TODAY.”
Negative people will see a situation only in a specific context eg – “At least THIS went right.”
Below are a few more examples of events generalized by people with a negative outlook.
“It’s ALWAYS a mess when I meet someone new.”
“This party is great, not like mine.”
“This is fun for now.”
“Well, THAT went okay, I guess.”
“I screwed up again.”
“This good weather won’t last.”
If you start explain things to yourself differently, you’ll see a difference in your attitude today. Make positive self talk your normal mode of operation, and you’ll see a difference in your life. One of the fastest ways to change your experience of life is to change your self talk.
Make a difference By Changing Your Inner Dialog
You can make a difference, not just to your own life, but to the lives of all those people that you come into contact with.
Recognize that you are at the crossroads where your decisions and choices are yours and yours alone.
Realize that you’re the one making the conscious decision to change your damaging self talk and undermining beliefs and behaviors. No one else can do it for you.
Change “I can’t” or “I won’t” to “I Can, I Will” on a consistent basis.
Pay attention to the emotional changes going on within you. Be prepared to physically describe your changes and write them down.
Repeat the process of writing down your changing feelings and behaviors and compare your notes every day.
Measure your progress by the visible reoccurrences of positive self-talk and healthy behaviors. Continual negative self-talk will create resentments and dis-empowering beliefs. Self-resentment is the seed that grows into self-sabotaging behaviors.
Plant the seeds that produce positive, empowering beliefs and actions.
Ask yourself, “Are my actions linked to pleasure-producing situations or to pain-producing situations?”
Take the road that gives you pleasure, not grief. The personal growth experienced from facing a fearful or painful event, or adversity, is important for self-improvement. However, don’t make a steady diet of it. You can grow and change by cultivating positive emotions such as joy, excitement, and happiness.
But first let us look at what is meant by “Making A Difference”?
By contributing your own time, services that you offer, an idea you have or methods that you could implement, you could improve the lives of others as well as make a difference if your own life.
The biggest problem is that you are too busy “living” and don’t have the time or resources to make a difference in your live or the life of others. Self-sabotaging behaviors prevent you from conditioning yourself for success. And changing those long, established behavior patterns like self-sabotage is as difficult as recognizing and understanding them.
Before you go around believing you can change the beliefs and behavior of others, you have to first change yourself.
This means overcoming resistances and sabotaging behaviors that have prevented you from experiencing an optimistic attitude. No matter what obstacles you face, developing an optimistic attitude, and changing unrewarding behaviors and beliefs, will awaken you to eliminate self-sabotaging behaviors.
What specific actions can you now take to become aware of and overcome your sabotaging beliefs and self-defeating emotions?
To get clear about your version of making a difference – ask yourself these questions:
How do I want to make a difference?
Decide to let go of self-sabotaging behaviors that prevent you from changing takes courage and a personal commitment to develop more effective actions.
Think about what you could do, helping others will also help you feel better about yourself.
Take time to get involved in a charity, animal shelter, or other activities that help others. Inspire and educate people how to handle stress and regain their vitality.
How will it feel, when you think about making a difference in your or someone else’s life?
You will get good feedback from others and develop a genuine sense that you are a good person. What you give comes back to you, so make sure it is only good that goes out.
It must be fulfilling, because with every person who is doing this, they exercise a happier and more joyful life.
You will be inspired. It feels so good finding solutions for you own problems.
Successful people are characterized by the words that they speak.
Have a great day and check out John Kehoe’s website (Partnerlink)
Improve Your Life – Inspire Others!